cinema_babe: (Celtic Cross)
cinema_babe ([personal profile] cinema_babe) wrote2012-04-07 07:06 pm

A Holy Week Meditation



Good Friday was very intense for me, as always. Even though Easter (arguably) is the most significant celebration in the church, Good Friday is what strikes me right behind my sternum. I think in part it's because Holy Week is about the humanity of Jesus. I can worship a deity but I can *identify* with another human being.

For me Good Friday is the apex of that. Almost every day, 363.5 days of the year, I believe that Christ himself sits in a place of honor in the church, a sacred space. On Good Friday part of the ceremony is the removal of that presence. It is the only day that there is no Mass because Jesus is dead, he is physically not amongst us.

I feel a palpable sense of loss and bereavement.

There are two things that run through my mind as I meditate:

1. The feeling of being in a dark, lonely and/or dangerous place and sensing that there is no one, nothing, to save or even comfort you. To be deserted by your friends, have powerful people rat you like an object, to literally be held up to public scorn and ridicule. It is such a cold, heartbreaking place.

I think that every adult (or at least those of us who have dealt with the deep indigo of depression) have stood in that umbra. It has happened and as our lives flow on, it is likely that it may happen again. But if I never stand in the umbra, I don't know that I could ever truly appreciate the bright sun.

2. Years ago I knew a woman, who I'll call Jane, who's son had died in his late 20s after a lifelong illness. She talked about the Crucifixion and she identified closely with Mary. It was because in the myth, an angel came to Mary and announced to her that she would bear a son who would be The Savior of the World. Mary was the *only* human who knew 100% for sure of Jesus' divine nature, everyone else, even Joseph her husband, took it as an article of faith.

Jane said that she could imagine this middle aged woman standing at the foot of the cross watching her son's execution all the while remembering that glorious promise even as she she watched her son die. How could she possibly have understood what it was all about. Despite that, not even knowing what the future could hold, knowing that her own life could quite possible be in danger, she held on to her faith. I think of Jane every year.

Tonight in Churches all over the globe people will begin coming together after sunset tonight and throughout the day tomorrow. The lights will be thrown on in the church building and Jesus will be returned to his space for another year. There will be flowers and pageantry and joyful celebrations. Once again this year I will pray the same prayer, "Let me always be open to your will will for me and for all mankind. May I always remember during the dark nights my that your light is always in my grasp.


To all my friends who celebrate the Son and/or the Sun, to my friends who commemorate the fulfillment of a promise and to my friends who are enjoying the winter, I wish you success, joy, and blessings. May you all always see light, however you conceive of it, during your darkest of nights.

[identity profile] kosmicseer.livejournal.com 2012-04-08 06:22 am (UTC)(link)

Thank you for this beautiful, thought-provoking entry. I don't comment as often as I should, but I read all of your entries and I am glad that I do.

Atheism is seemingly so popular on the internet, and people seem to be so oddly evangelistic about it. This makes reading any statement of faith an occasion for gratitude, but even more so when it is as eloquent and intelligent as yours.

I myself am very lucky to have been blessed with faith in God from my earliest memory. I have been angry at God, and I have certainly been deeply depressed but I have always known that God exists and that an afterlife exists. I am pretty unsure of the specifics, although I was raised Catholic.

I feel very sorry for everyone who does not share my faith in God. Even though many fellow believers' behavior & attitudes make me cringe. So, again, huzzah for cinema_babe.

Happy Easter!

[identity profile] cinema-babe.livejournal.com 2012-04-08 08:27 am (UTC)(link)
I am relieved that atheists and anyone else who doesn't believe as I do have a strong voice in society today. First, it's just plain old fashioned American. The freedom of speech as well as the freedom to worship or not as you see fit. Less than 100 years ago a teacher could be fired for teaching evolution, today you have states that are re-writing science books to equate the Judeo-Christian myth of creation with scientific theory.

Who is the voice that helps to keep us from becoming a theocracy?

In a world today where certain sectors of Christians are so strident, I can't think of a better time for those who don't believe in a god to be very vocal and demand their place at the table too. These are people who have ethics and moral code (and let's be honest, some of them behave more like Christians than some Christians).

Another reason I respect Atheists is because they can challenge my faith. Faith does not, and I would say should not, be rooted in default behaviors and beliefs. As adults we should always be evaluating what we believe and why we believe it. Dialogues with people who don't share my beliefs help me to do that.

Being blunt, when you say that you feel sorry for everyone who does not share your faith it makes me very uncomfortable. I don't see the choice not to believe in a deity (or deities) as an absence or a lacking. It's just a different way of being and comporting one's life.

I don't see a reason to feel sorry for or pity people who believe who don't share out beliefs and I'm not sure that the would want or be thrilled with any sort of pity.

I'm always concerned that ideas like that, no matter how well intentioned, can become a slippery slope in the wrong hands.

Have Happy and Blessed Easter

[identity profile] kosmicseer.livejournal.com 2012-04-23 02:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I feel sorry for people without faith in life after death, a spiritual dimension to our world and/or in God. This is because to me these are the deepest comforts of my life, and I cannot imagine such a narrow view of the world. It seems very grim to me.

I don't usually say this to fervent atheists, because I imagine that they would not take my sentiments kindly.

I guess I should be more grateful to atheists for keeping the extra religious sects in check.

[identity profile] cinema-babe.livejournal.com 2012-04-23 07:00 pm (UTC)(link)
This part of a type of Christian conceit that I find so unpleasant. It's one thing to say, This brings me comfort" but it's another altogether to say "I cannot imagine such a narrow view of the world. It seems very grim to me".

You're saying that your worldview is better than than another person's because of what you choose to believe.

Atheists and other who don't share the Christian beliefs aren't grim people any more than Christians are because we annually revisit the torture and death of our God. Individuals may be grim but whole groups? No.

[identity profile] badseed1980.livejournal.com 2012-04-08 01:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Very thought-provoking. And, although I'm not and have never been Catholic, it's something with which I can identify. In Wicca, on the first of August, we celebrate a holiday called Lammas. The central theme of that holiday is one of sacrifice. In our mythos, that is the time at which our god offers himself as a sacrifice so as to ensure that even as we cut down our crops in the harvest, our seeds will spring to new life the next year. The sacrifice is performed by the goddess, his consort, who loves him. It's an incredibly poignant ritual, one that often leaves me in tears. The sorrow of having to give up this life while you're in your prime, and happy with a loved one...the sorrow of having to be the one to cause the death of the one you love...all so life can return again--a promise for a future you can't really see yet. Yeah, it's heavy.