cinema_babe | These are so wrong but they still make me laugh (aka Yeah, I've Got a Twisted Sense of Humor)

Children's Books That Never Made It (Courtesy of Mistress W.Y.N.)

1. One Bitch, Two Bitch, Dead Bitch, You Bitch

2. Herbert the Pervert Likes Sherbert

3. Fox In Detox

4. Who Shat in the Hat?

5. Horton Hires a Ho

6. The Flesh-Eating Lorax

7. How the Grinch Stole Columbus Day

8. Your Colon Can Moo - Can You?

9. Zippy the Rabid Gerbil

10. The Cat in the Blender

11. Marvin K. Mooney, Get the F*ck Out!

12. Are You My Proctologist?

13. Yentl the Lentil

14. My Pocket Rocket Needs a Socket

15. Aunts in My Pants

16. You Are Different and That's Bad

17. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables

18. Dad's New Wife Robert

19. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share

20. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book

21. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking

22. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her

23. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence

24. All Cats Go to Hell

25. The Little Sissy Who Snitched

26. Some Kittens Can Fly

27. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption

28. Grandpa Gets a Casket

29. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator

30. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia

31. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy

32. Strangers Have the Best Candy

33. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way

34. You Were an Accident

35. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will

36. Pop! Goes The Hamster..And Other Great Microwave Games

37. The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan

38. Your Nightmares Are Real

39. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?

40. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School

41. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?

42. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things

43. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry

44. Padington Gets Tanked

45. Furious George and The Puppies

46. The Story of Babar: The Little Elephant Who Was Shot and Killed For His Ivory

47. The Little Engine That Couldn't Because He Was A Worthless Bum Like Your Father

48. Run Away From Home: Your Parents Will Thank You

49. Everybody Dies... Even Your Mommy and Daddy

50. Timmy's First Gay Bar

51. 40 Whacks: Counting With Lizzie

52. When Mommy Leaves Daddy, and What You Did To Cause It

53. Where's Waldo's Weewee?

54. Barney's Bleeding and Nobody Can Help

55. Furious George Delivers The Mail

56. 29 Ways To Fake A Fever

57. Charlie and The Obsessive Compulsive Eating Disorder

58. 101 Things You Can Do At The Bottom Of The Pool

59. Daddies and Mommies and Mistresses, Oh My!

60. The Seven Year Old's Guide To Faking Your Own Death

61. The Secret Diary Of The Monster Living Under Your Bed

62. Charlie and The Abandoned Armaments Factory

63. Controlling The Playground: Respect Through Fear

64. The Little Engine That Could Gets Drunk and Kills Several Pedestrians

65. Testing Homemade Parachutes Using Only Your Household Pets

66. The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead

67. What is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?

68. Bi-Curious George

69. The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer...... Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!

70:Lets make the new Baby disappear!