The deed is done
Dec. 1st, 2005 07:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cinema_babeWell, I finally told my mother that M and I are getting divorced. She cried.
I am 41 years old and my relationship with my mother is as complicated and snarled as a skein of yarn but the one thing that gives me a physical heartache is when my mother cries. I've only seen her cry a *handful of times in my life so it's very potent and a cuts me to the core when it happens.
She was as supportive as she was able to be and it wasn't too bad. She didn't try to evoke morality or religion and for that I am grateful. Of course she wanted to know if we could try to stay together and I had to tell her that we had actually been separated since the summer but that we didn't want to say anything until I was able to move out (not that I'm even close to moving out but...) She showed genuine concern for both M and I.
My mom really rose the occasion; I'm an idiot for not trusting her to.
[Edited to add: My father died when I was about and she didn't cry when she told me. I'm not sure how long she had to prepare for that conversation. When her younger sister died, I remember expressing regret but I don't remember her crying then either. If I leave out the years after she began having her nervous breakdowns (about 1990)
The only time I remember her crying was when she was snooping through my stuff when I was in high school, found a short story I wrote about a girl who get pregnant and thought it was true. In her defense, the story was in the form of a suicide note and I was a little wacky, so in retrospect, I can see why she got freaked out.]
I am 41 years old and my relationship with my mother is as complicated and snarled as a skein of yarn but the one thing that gives me a physical heartache is when my mother cries. I've only seen her cry a *handful of times in my life so it's very potent and a cuts me to the core when it happens.
She was as supportive as she was able to be and it wasn't too bad. She didn't try to evoke morality or religion and for that I am grateful. Of course she wanted to know if we could try to stay together and I had to tell her that we had actually been separated since the summer but that we didn't want to say anything until I was able to move out (not that I'm even close to moving out but...) She showed genuine concern for both M and I.
My mom really rose the occasion; I'm an idiot for not trusting her to.
[Edited to add: My father died when I was about and she didn't cry when she told me. I'm not sure how long she had to prepare for that conversation. When her younger sister died, I remember expressing regret but I don't remember her crying then either. If I leave out the years after she began having her nervous breakdowns (about 1990)
The only time I remember her crying was when she was snooping through my stuff when I was in high school, found a short story I wrote about a girl who get pregnant and thought it was true. In her defense, the story was in the form of a suicide note and I was a little wacky, so in retrospect, I can see why she got freaked out.]
