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cinema_babeSo I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed these days which has led to a deterioration in my ability to multi task. The realization of said deterioration is triggering a great deal of anxiety which is alternating with the black hoodie of depression which is leading to daydreams of myself ending up like my mother; a phalanx of pill bottles in front of me filled with meds that will stop me feeling like I'm slipping down the drain while draining all of the subtle shading from my personality.
Whew! Boy am I glad to get that out.
My therapist, in a Yoda like moment, said to me, "Your intellect is your strength. Use it to build the bridge you need and then walk across."
Hmmmm. OK.
Step 1 - The facts indicate that I will not be like my mother. I have friends, acquaintances, a blog and a kick ass therapist; What more do I need? I am fully committed to the therapeutic process. For me it is about self evolution, not just 'feeling happy'.
Step 2 - In the past 2 years I have lost my job, marriage and home, had a hysterectomy, battled cancer and gone back to school. Depressed? I would be abnormal if I wasn't depressed and occasionally anxious. It's situational and transitory and will pass. All I need to do is stay the course
Step 3 - My plate is full and I cannot eat it all in one bite. This is what I must consume by Sunday evening:
If I have time I will complete the next revision of my final project (I think this will be the penultimate one, YEA!)
I can do these things all at the same time or one at a time, it doesn't matter as long as I do them. My therapist was right, I do feel much better now.
Whew! Boy am I glad to get that out.
My therapist, in a Yoda like moment, said to me, "Your intellect is your strength. Use it to build the bridge you need and then walk across."
Hmmmm. OK.
Step 1 - The facts indicate that I will not be like my mother. I have friends, acquaintances, a blog and a kick ass therapist; What more do I need? I am fully committed to the therapeutic process. For me it is about self evolution, not just 'feeling happy'.
Step 2 - In the past 2 years I have lost my job, marriage and home, had a hysterectomy, battled cancer and gone back to school. Depressed? I would be abnormal if I wasn't depressed and occasionally anxious. It's situational and transitory and will pass. All I need to do is stay the course
Step 3 - My plate is full and I cannot eat it all in one bite. This is what I must consume by Sunday evening:
- Set up my mother's ebay store
- Complete my chart so I know what I need for each grad program I'm applying to
- Call my cousin and tell her I'm getting divorced
- Email/call my friend Roger to see if he will write a letter of reccomendation for me (he and I worked together for over 10 years on several projects)
- Schedule an appointment to take my GRE
If I have time I will complete the next revision of my final project (I think this will be the penultimate one, YEA!)
I can do these things all at the same time or one at a time, it doesn't matter as long as I do them. My therapist was right, I do feel much better now.
