What's a Friend?
Oct. 22nd, 2005 03:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cinema_babeI have always been one of those people who can get along with (almost) anyone, has a good number of acquaintances at work/school and the like but, only a very few people I consider friends.
I'm a very private person and tend to keep most people at arms length. It's really a big deal for me to let anyone into my "inner circle". Once you’re there, though, I've got your back for life. There is nothing I won't do for my friends: money, mayhem, murder; nothing. (Well, maybe not actual *murder* but you get the general idea.)
I never used to believe that you could truly make friends in an on-line environment because of the loss of the face to face element. (I'll post my thoughts on the Windows of Johari vis a vis relationships on-line and IRL some other time.) I've been lucky enough to meet some great people who have challenged my attitudes about the reality of a relationship between people who only interact in an electronic environment versus IRL. I still think that on-line friendships are a different animal then friendships IRL but I've come to see, no, *experience* that the love, support and, yes sometimes drama, can be there whether you ever share a cup of coffee with someone or not.
People I *don’t* like? I usually try to just to give them a wide berth so I don’t have to be nice to someone I dislike. If I don't like you and you insist upon inserting yourself in my life (try to create the illusion that I like you or cross my "politeness boundary" in any way) let's just say I hope you have a couple of big fluffy towels to wipe up your blood. I'll warn you the first time. The second time? I do my best imitation of a wood chipper on your ass.
I truly don't like letting that beast loose; it's like I become someone else. (There's a streak of mental illness a mile wide in the women on my mother's side and it scares me to imagine what I would be like if I hadn't been in therapy for so many years: smart as a whip *and* angrily out of control....). Fortunately, I don't get violent anymore when I get angry. I feel this tremendous *weight*, a responsiblity, because I really think that in some ways I can do a lot more damage with my words then I could ever do with a well aimed shoe. "The more you know, the more you owe."
Hmmmm, I'm not as scary as this post might make me seem. Really.
I'm a very private person and tend to keep most people at arms length. It's really a big deal for me to let anyone into my "inner circle". Once you’re there, though, I've got your back for life. There is nothing I won't do for my friends: money, mayhem, murder; nothing. (Well, maybe not actual *murder* but you get the general idea.)
I never used to believe that you could truly make friends in an on-line environment because of the loss of the face to face element. (I'll post my thoughts on the Windows of Johari vis a vis relationships on-line and IRL some other time.) I've been lucky enough to meet some great people who have challenged my attitudes about the reality of a relationship between people who only interact in an electronic environment versus IRL. I still think that on-line friendships are a different animal then friendships IRL but I've come to see, no, *experience* that the love, support and, yes sometimes drama, can be there whether you ever share a cup of coffee with someone or not.
People I *don’t* like? I usually try to just to give them a wide berth so I don’t have to be nice to someone I dislike. If I don't like you and you insist upon inserting yourself in my life (try to create the illusion that I like you or cross my "politeness boundary" in any way) let's just say I hope you have a couple of big fluffy towels to wipe up your blood. I'll warn you the first time. The second time? I do my best imitation of a wood chipper on your ass.
I truly don't like letting that beast loose; it's like I become someone else. (There's a streak of mental illness a mile wide in the women on my mother's side and it scares me to imagine what I would be like if I hadn't been in therapy for so many years: smart as a whip *and* angrily out of control....). Fortunately, I don't get violent anymore when I get angry. I feel this tremendous *weight*, a responsiblity, because I really think that in some ways I can do a lot more damage with my words then I could ever do with a well aimed shoe. "The more you know, the more you owe."
Hmmmm, I'm not as scary as this post might make me seem. Really.
